Let's Spin The Block Ep 4

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Music.

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And what's up, you guys? This is another episode of the Nuccaheader Chronicles.

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And so, on the last episode of Dragon Ball Z, no, I'm kidding, I'm kidding.

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All right, so this is episode four. Spinning the block, y'all.

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What we're going to do in this episode is a continuation from episode three.

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Now, we got into my relationship with the older lady, Shirley,

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is what we called her in this episode, called Shirley.

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And this is a continuation because it's really, episode four is really a cautionary tale for real.

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Like when you're dealing with some people, and I got some comments and I got

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some questions, not really questions, but really comments about dating older

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people and everybody's like, oh, age is just a number.

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And that's true, age is just a number. However, when you're dealing with people

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who are, Even because they're older, they're not as mature and as wise as we would like them to be.

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Because we figure, like, if you remember the last episode, I told you that this

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one was 26 years my senior.

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And you would figure that a woman that is that seasoned, she would be more adapt

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to, you know, she would be more adapt to nurturing a young guy. Right.

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You know, almost like, you know, not mothering because, you know,

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men don't need to be mothered, right, in a relationship.

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And that's the point that I'm making. A lot of men in these older relationships,

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they tend to get mothered.

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Now, what happens is, you know, when you're getting mothered,

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you're getting smothered, right?

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When mothering comes in, smothering comes in. Trust me.

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And they want to know where you're going. they want to know,

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you know, if you have any interactions with any other woman outside of them,

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and that makes them insecure.

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So you deal with a lot of insecurity if you're dealing with an older woman.

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You know what I'm saying? And I'm just talking about in my case.

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Your case may be different, because you may have someone who's seasoned and

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who knows how to handle the situation.

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I did not. And this is what this cautionary tale is about.

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So, let's get into the... What? Let's get into the fuckery, shall we?

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So, there were a lot of instances where this woman, even though I had moved

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on, and I'm gonna insert my second wife here.

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I'm not gonna give you names, of course, you guys already know that.

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So in this particular episode, I am going to nickname her Strawberry, Strawberry.

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That's it. That's as far as it goes.

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That this, Strawberry is the one I went, you know, up to Chicago,

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went live with her, you know what I'm saying, left her, and,

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you know, the biggest mistake of my life, last episode, we got it.

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So, Strawberry, you know, we were getting along.

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And at this point in the game, we were just getting, it was kind of one of those,

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it was never one of those get to know you type situations. It was like you just,

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I just jumped right into a relationship with her.

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That's kind of no different in this case. I just jumped right through that shit

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with her. So we were getting along.

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But for some reason, Betty was, Shirley was still a mainstay.

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You know, tried to be, at least.

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And she just would not let the situation up for me. Here we go.

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Even though we've had conversations, and I've told her, you know, we were done.

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Now, there are a lot of instances where our relationship got physical, me and Shirley.

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Got physical. We're not talking about just verbal conversations anymore.

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And I'm going to give you a couple of stories of that. One main story.

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You know, this is early on. Me and Strawberry, early on. And I was still struggling, but I could not.

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Anybody who's ever had that emotional tie, you know, to my roots,

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you know, in the last episode, So if anybody's had one of those on them,

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it is the emotional incapability of letting that person go, right?

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To me, I just said, this is Terry here.

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And for some reason, I just couldn't let the idea of her go,

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even though I wanted to let her go because she was no good to me, no good at all.

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So, again, me and Strawberry's rolling along, raising kids.

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She's got three that we're raising together. And when I tell you that my second

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marriage was a complete and utter, my second wife, Charberry and I loved her dearly.

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I still do. I can be honest with you. I still do.

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However, I made so many bad things and bad choices with her.

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It's not even funny. When I fell with the okie dokie left and no one,

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they come back home. That was the situation.

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There's a lot of situations that I caused in that marriage that when she decided

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to leave me in 2010, you know,

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You know, I gave her credence. What am I going to do? You know?

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So back to the story. Me and Strawberry got married in 2003.

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Again, before some of you listening to this were born. But we got married in 2003.

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Just a little story with that. I don't know if I mentioned it in the last episode.

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I'll mention it in this one.

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When we got married, it was an omen. You know, you talk about having bad omens.

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When we got married, this was

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January 23rd. I remember like it's yesterday because it was a birthday.

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And so this particular day, we got up and we would turn to get married, right?

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But it was a high storm where we lived at the time.

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And that particular morning, they came, they cut off our water.

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And we didn't have any water. We could take showers. We could do anything.

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So I had to walk a trek where we lived to town hall to pay the water bill.

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Amazingly, they were open, right?

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And so we went and paid the water bill.

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And I trekked back home in the snow in the ice and because we didn't have a

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car right so we walked I walked to the town hall to get the water cut back on

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they came back to cut the water on,

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and she was still determined she was still determined I loved to do the day

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for that she was so determined we're getting married got married all that day

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we walked down to the magistrate's office together in the ice and snow and got

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married very crazy story but it just showed the love that she had for me and the depths

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because when I left in 01 and went back to North Carolina, you know,

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despite the reason why or how I left,

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Chicago, when I called her and talked to her, she was so, I won't say infatuated,

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but she was so in love with me that she just, she said, I'm going to go wherever

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you, I want to be wherever you are.

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And she packed up herself, packed up the kids, came to North Carolina.

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Love her to this day for that. So, yeah.

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We get to get down in north carolina we got we get married no three

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and things were just good we worked at this we worked at

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the same chicken plant now anybody listen

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to this that are from north carolina they know what chicken i'm talking about

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very famous chicken plant but we worked there in monroe north carolina together

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and we worked the same shift there's this nature and we just had so much our

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marriage was tumultuous and it wasn't nothing that she did it was me it was all me like the chair.

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I know some people say, you can't take all the blame. I can. And this one, I can't.

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So, but he knew, she, we're at the same place and we were just chugging along.

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And I'm surely still in the background, you know, trying to work some stuff out.

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So one particular instance, one particular story, and I'm going to tell this

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story and I'm going to get out of here.

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I'm going to tell you the story and I'm going to give you my carcinitary tale. And I'm gone, right?

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So this one particular evening, her 22th day, she had made a call.

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This is from before my auntie and my mother passed away.

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My mother died in 07, my auntie died in 08. So just to give you a little bit of background.

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So somehow, she got a hold of my auntie, my auntie B, Mr. Dilley, rest in peace auntie.

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She got a hold of my auntie, and my auntie kind of spilled the beans on us, right?

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It's not like we were hiding or living under witness protection.

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We were just living our life, you know.

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And so my auntie decided to tell her where we lived, right?

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So I don't know why she would, to this day, I still don't know why she would.

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I've always wanted to ask her. Of course, I'm never going to have the ability

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to ask her, but she's not here anymore.

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But I've always wanted to ask her, like, auntie, why would you tell her,

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you know, where we lived?

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But I never did get a chance to ask her. Anyhow, she tells my auntie.

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Well, my auntie tells her exactly where we lived. So one particular morning

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was getting ready to go to work.

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Now, my strawberry and I had different rides to work.

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I went in a little later. She went in earlier. So we had two different rides.

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And so, again, just to remind you, we did not have a car.

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So she went to work that morning.

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And I go out, you know, I look out my front door, and I recognized her vehicle

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because she had a green 4Runner. I know we'll forget it.

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And I looked at my front door and we had some trees that kind of grew out on the road.

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We lived on a back road, not the main highway, just on a back road, but it used to be trees.

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So it was like, you know, she could park behind the trees and all you can see is her headlights.

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And I'm looking in the front door and I'm like,

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Dang, that truck looks awful familiar, awful familiar.

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And I was like, no, that ain't her. That ain't her.

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But what I realized is what I didn't know was coming was emotional damage.

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So anyway, I am, I am, I am.

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So look at the front door. I see her truck. I didn't think anything happened.

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And so my ride, my ride came to pick me up. So I get in the car,

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and we're going to work, and we're almost out of our hometown. Now, she follows us.

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I looked in my mirror. I said, my man, I said, I think it's my ex behind us.

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So we pulled over, you know, on the side, in the parking lot,

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actually, of a grocery store, right outside of my hometown.

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She's in my hometown. We're right outside of it. So we get out,

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and I'm like, what the hell are you doing here? You know, why are you following me?

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I'm trying to get you to come back home. I mean, it was just a whole big,

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you know, scene that she made.

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Now, where it got tricky was because I didn't know she was on Demon Time.

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You know, when she was, when I tell you, she wanted to fight for her man.

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She literally wanted to fight for her man. So, we had to have a discussion.

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I was like, well, I'm not going anywhere with you.

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You know, I'm not. And we went into this argument.

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It lasted maybe 20 minutes, you know. And before I knew it, she put her hands on me.

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Now, I don't condone violence. I feel to this day, I still feel bad for what transpired that day.

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But when she put her hands on me, it was kind of like a, you know, it triggered me.

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So I remember, you know, throwing them back, you know.

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And before I knew it, I had her, I was,

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Choking her out on her vehicle was like, stop, this is crazy.

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I'm not going to go back with you, da-da-da-da-da.

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And we got to, I mean, it was terrible, you know.

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So I ended up, I had to end up filing a restraining order against her because the cops got involved.

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So the cops come and they're like, you know, they take her because my witness,

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my ride, he told them, hey, she put her hands on him first.

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And so they ended up arresting her. So I had to go back to my hometown.

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I had to file a restraining order. Because this woman came all the way from

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Charlotte. Now that's 60 miles from where my hometown is to where Charlotte is.

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And they ended up arresting her. I was sitting in the courthouse.

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And I had to file a restraining order. Now, I don't know if people are going

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to listen to this and be like, man, you bitched out on me. No, no, it's not.

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I was finally tired of it. And then that was my final straw.

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And I had done a lot of things, you know, I go help with this woman.

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I've done a lot of things, did a lot of stuff from her.

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I was angry at the fact that she's my family, trying to find out where we live.

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I mean, she just, you know, all these backwards tactics, you know.

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And I said, why do you get tired? You know.

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Now, I will say this in closing you guys, that, you know, don't do that.

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Don't put your hands on people. You know what I'm saying? That goes both ways.

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Women to men, men to women. Don't put your hands on them.

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Because you just never know what people are going through.

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And I totally understand that, you know, her love for me, I think,

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I don't even think it was love, I think it was more so less than the control that she wanted.

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And I fit into that. And I fit into it because of what the emotional,

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the emotional connect that we have.

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So my cautionary tale before I go,

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is be careful of who you share energy with.

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See that when we, you know, society's a little different today than it was back

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then. This is back in the 05, maybe, maybe in 04.

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Things are different, you know, from then to now. But I always say this in this

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cartonary tale is that, be careful of who you share your emotional space with,

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because everybody isn't as mature as you would like them to be.

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Trouble lurks around every corner, even in relationships. And if,

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you know, I think back then, they didn't have a name.

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It was like, oh, she just, you know, but today's society, they call it crashing

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out. And that's exactly what she did. She crashed out on me.

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And you have to be careful when people crash out because, you know,

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some people just, they can't handle it.

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You know, emotional stability is, you know, that comes with work.

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It comes with maturity.

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Maturity.

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And just because you're older doesn't make you mature. I'm an older gentleman.

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I'm the big fish in the little pond now.

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So I have to be careful. I don't, you know, I don't want to deal with nobody if I can't.

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Because I can't get with and control my emotional stability.

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There's no way in the world I can deal with somebody else's right now.

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Especially with my cancer journey and we got to, I got to update on that.

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It was like around the 8th Wednesday.

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Just be very careful. I'm not going to say that I wish I had never met her,

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but I will say that I wish I would have not jumped into it so quickly with her

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and created the atmosphere or the space for her to be like she did me.

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Because I did not check the whole motherly thing, it came back to bite me.

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And because I didn't say, another thing, When you say stuff...

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Be a man or a woman of your word. If you say something, stand 10 toes down.

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See, back in the day, I couldn't do that.

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I could do it now, but I couldn't do it then. I would say, oh,

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I don't want to be with you. And then the next breath, we hunched.

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You know what I'm saying?

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So it gave her, it gave her, it emboldened her to act the way he acted.

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A lot of it is not just, maybe it wasn't just her being crazy.

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Maybe it was partly I was giving her mixed signals because I was a young man.

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And the only thing I wanted was to coach. You know what I'm saying? So you have to be honest.

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And it was a mistake because, like I said before, it emboldened her to be this

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senile, crazy black woman who all she wanted was, you know, the thought of being with me.

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You know, I wouldn't negotiate with a guy, you know.

00:16:48.087 --> 00:16:50.887
Back then, I was still young in the game, you know what I'm saying?

00:16:50.887 --> 00:16:59.027
And so this whole story with me chucking this woman out because she put her hands on me.

00:16:59.127 --> 00:17:03.687
I'm not saying she put her hands on me. I told you there's another story. I missed it.

00:17:04.267 --> 00:17:09.087
It happened like earlier, maybe six months before that, where she pulled a knife on me.

00:17:09.247 --> 00:17:12.647
This woman was physically intimidating.

00:17:13.127 --> 00:17:15.907
She was from South Carolina. She didn't play no game. You know what I'm saying?

00:17:16.567 --> 00:17:20.487
Anyway, the fact that I put my hand on her, I had to pay for that.

00:17:20.487 --> 00:17:27.487
And after that, I had so many bad dreams and, you know, God really dealt with

00:17:27.487 --> 00:17:29.047
me, you know, about that.

00:17:29.227 --> 00:17:32.107
And so, and I haven't put my hand on a woman since, you know,

00:17:32.127 --> 00:17:35.987
saying even though she initiated, I haven't put my hand on a woman since.

00:17:36.905 --> 00:17:42.265
So be mindful of who you share your emotional space with because people,

00:17:42.425 --> 00:17:45.305
like I said before, again, this is a cautionary tale.

00:17:45.625 --> 00:17:50.205
Be mindful because you don't know where people stand. You don't know where they are.

00:17:51.145 --> 00:17:55.205
And we have been fighting this fight for years. I've been gone for years.

00:17:55.625 --> 00:18:02.125
Married a whole other woman. You know what I'm saying? And she was still trying to get me back.

00:18:02.505 --> 00:18:05.465
So listen, it's not worth it.

00:18:06.365 --> 00:18:09.745
Evaluate the situation that you're in. If you're in a relationship right now

00:18:09.745 --> 00:18:12.725
and you're thinking about it and you don't understand, you don't know,

00:18:12.985 --> 00:18:13.505
you know what I'm saying?

00:18:14.285 --> 00:18:20.905
Please evaluate because now trauma is a real thing. You know, PTSD is a real thing.

00:18:21.465 --> 00:18:27.585
There are certain things that I see now that if it remotely comes close, it triggers my PTSD.

00:18:28.125 --> 00:18:31.105
That's why I don't go out a lot. I don't hang out with a lot of people,

00:18:31.425 --> 00:18:35.565
you know, and it triggers the PTSD. So be mindful of what you deal with because

00:18:35.565 --> 00:18:40.785
some things in life you cannot take back. I promise you you can.

00:18:41.145 --> 00:18:43.725
And it will affect you. It will hurt you.

00:18:44.705 --> 00:18:49.665
Now, going into episode five, going into more with Strawberry,

00:18:50.345 --> 00:18:52.365
that marriage was a little different.

00:18:53.225 --> 00:18:56.125
But it was a great marriage. We'll get into that in episode five.

00:18:56.325 --> 00:18:57.885
But I hope you enjoyed episode four.

00:18:58.565 --> 00:19:03.705
Again, you can follow the podcast at knuckleheadchroniclespodcast.pybean.com.

00:19:04.485 --> 00:19:06.485
You can listen to it on Spotify and YouTube.

00:19:08.125 --> 00:19:11.685
And I guess I will get you guys down the line at some point or another.

00:19:13.165 --> 00:19:16.905
You know, I hope you guys enjoy the rest of the Memorial Day.

00:19:17.105 --> 00:19:19.765
I hope you are barbecuing. I didn't get to go to a barbecue this year. It's okay.

00:19:20.885 --> 00:19:25.205
I like barbecue too. Damn it. All right. But anyway, I love you guys.

00:19:25.565 --> 00:19:27.165
I will see you guys down the line.

00:19:28.240 --> 00:20:02.113
Music.